Dumped & Divorced

The Road to Healing and Self-Love

• Natalie & Maressa • Season 1 • Episode 1

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Ever wonder how heartbreak can actually fuel personal growth and self-discovery? Join us, Natalie and Maressa, as we kick off the very first episode of Dumped & Divorced. We're sharing our raw and real experiences of navigating the stormy seas of breakups that rocked our worlds back in 2022, offering you a glimpse into our journeys of healing and self-love. With a blend of humor and honesty, we recount our stories of a divorce and a broken engagement, all while emphasizing the importance of personal development and sibling support. We're here to provide solace for those enduring similar heartaches, and together, we delve into the therapeutic power of speaking our truths and embracing the single life.

In this episode, we also rewind the clock to explore the complex web of young love and the pressures that come with it. We reflect on our college years, where the vibrant world of life with no responsibilities collided with the challenges of long-term relationships. From communication struggles to the shadows that threatened our self-confidence, we open up about the lessons we've learned and how they've shaped our present-day selves. As we recount these pivotal moments, we're reminded of the strength found in self-awareness and the joy of growing into our true selves. We are beyond grateful for your support and can’t wait to share more in upcoming episodes.

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Natalie:

Is this thing on? This is our third time trying to record episode one.

Maressa:

You shouldn't say that people don't need to know that we're such newbies. Newbies with the podcast.

Natalie:

Well you know what this is is something that we're learning as we're going, and when we have it all figured out, we're going to come back to episode one and be like look how much we've grown

Maressa:

It's kind of like how we are talking about how much we've grown of ourselves.

Natalie:

Okay, so welcome to Dumped and Divorced episode one. Episode one, take three, take three and the final one. Okay, so my name is Natalie,

Maressa:

and my name is Maressa and we are sisters.

Natalie:

Yes, we've been talking about this idea for a couple of years now. Yes, I mean basically.

Maressa:

Sorry, that is my dog, Bentley,

Natalie:

And I'm probably not going to edit that out.

Maressa:

No, it's fine. I mean, everyone who knows Bentley loves Bentley.

Natalie:

Yeah, it's kind of like working from home, when you would be on Zoom calls and

Maressa:

Your kids were running around in the background or your dog was barking Straight.

Maressa:

Chaos, yeah, chaos.

Natalie:

Okay, so welcome to our podcast. This is a podcast that's going to focus on self-love growth. We're going to talk about relational trauma. We're going to talk about things that you know we tried to implement in our lives when we went through both of our breakups yeah Right,

Maressa:

Yeah, Back in 2022. We both went through some breakups and we're going to talk about it right now that so many years have passed. We believe that speaking our stories might alleviate or relate to some people right or feel like they're not alone, and we have grown both individually. We're going to talk about the events that happened, the breakups, what we did to overcome said breakups and also, you know, just really focusing in on that inner work we did. We're not here to talk ill of our exes. We're just going to say our side of the story and we're going to be mature about it. We're going to just focus on our side and what we did, how we felt during those times and what we did to lean in on each other and focus on the positive outcome of it all. I would say because you and I've both grown tremendously over the years and people who know our stories know that initially we didn't like talking about it. We didn't want to kind of air our laundry out, but now that so much time has passed, I think we're ready to, not because we feel like it's necessary, but it's almost therapeutic in a way.

Natalie:

Yeah, it's like I mean I 100% agree, because I go to the sauna, when I go to the gym and I do my sauna thoughts and just like writing out sentences like my thoughts or my feelings or just about life, it helps. So I think that this is going to be part of our journey, our healing journey. I mean I don't think we're ever going to not be on our healing journey, you know, because we're still kind of where we were three years ago. At the same time, you know, I wouldn't say that I mean, in a way, we've grown,

Maressa:

But oh, we're still single?!

Natalie:

Yeah

Maressa:

Yeah, hey, you know, I'm actually really enjoying my singlehood loving loving my single era. But if anyone wants to slide in my dms,

Natalie:

Oh my gosh, you would, you would, I mean I

Natalie:

We had to kind of rediscover who we were oh, totally, absolutely, you had.

Maressa:

We had to hit rock bottom in order to truly discover ourselves, yeah, and love ourselves and I think that's the beauty in it and it truly. I think I've learned a lot about myself over the years and I now know what I want in future relationships and I will make sure that things that have happened in my previous relationship I can then focus on what I don't want or what I don't want to happen, because I wasn't like in tune with all of those things.

Natalie:

Our stories are pretty relatable in the sense that you and mine were similar. I got divorced, you were engaged.

Maressa:

And almost like four months out of the wedding. I know, yes, not like a year out, four months till the wedding,

Natalie:

Not like initial engaged and then breaking off the engagement. You had everything planned, everything like deposited and paid for.

Maressa:

We will get there, guys. We will talk about all of that. Also, too, I want to note that we both were in long-term relationships. You were married, that's where I was going. Yeah, you were married to your ex-husband 10 years.

Natalie:

Well, but we both met them in college. Yes, they were our like college sweethearts yeah yeah, aka, we found someone that we connected with in college when we were like 20 years old.

Natalie:

Yeah, totally and we settled. So anyways, here or there, that this is our podcast,

Maressa:

And I also want to note that Natalie's gonna love this comment because she's a Colleen Hoover fan. But Colleen Hoover said in her most famous book naked truths aren't pretty.

Natalie:

No, they're not

Maressa:

And you are literally wearing the sweatshirt, um, which it just shows that, like we're willing to share our naked truths and we're also willing to let you guys in a side of our lives, that we don't have to let you in, but we're going to be vulnerable and help you understand that you're not alone and that there is a light at the end of the tunnel.

Natalie:

There is, there is!

Maressa:

I would say that yeah, so Ooh. I'm about to dive in

Natalie:

Oh you're going sing, I'm gonna sing.

Maressa:

I just love quoting songs, so I'm gonna like every now and then quote some songs.

Natalie:

I have no idea what song that song is.

Maressa:

Uh, trey, trey song,

Natalie:

Who's trey?

Maressa:

Oh gosh, Natalie you totally knew. Trey song,

Natalie:

Oh yeah he was like.

Maressa:

He was like a relatable like a rapper

Natalie:

When we were in, maybe college. Yeah in, like the 2000s, yeah, yes, I remember him oh.

Maressa:

Also we're going to preface. For those who don't know us, natalie and I are five years apart. Yes, she's the older sister. We do have a brother in between us, and it's not just her and I, it's not the Natalie and Marissa show.

Natalie:

Marissa's in her early 30s and I'm in my mid 30s.

Maressa:

You're going to enter that late 30s here soon.

Natalie:

No, oh, no, no After this year it'll be late 30s, so I'm still technically in my mid 30s. So we're just a bunch of 30.

Maressa:

30 year olds

Natalie:

30 year old single women who their worlds came like crashing down. Ooh, in sync

Maressa:

That was very synchronized.

Natalie:

Yes, Back in 2022. So what do you want to do? Do you want to start? Do you want me to start? I mean, this is episode one and we're like eight minutes in, so here's going to be a synopsis, a summary of episode one.

Maressa:

Episode one.

Natalie:

Right, maybe we can kind of do this in the beginning, just so that the listeners kind of know what we're going to be talking about. Yeah, our goal here is for people to connect with us, to feel and understand some of the things that we went through in our relationships and help anybody that is experiencing hardships. Right, and no one is going to experience the same hardship you did. Totally no one's going to experience my hardship, yeah, but I think that the beauty in sharing these raw and vulnerable moments and experiences is that people can pull from it and relate to it. So I think that what we'll do here in this episode is talk a little bit about our past.

Maressa:

n that relationship,

Natalie:

In that relationship. Yeah, so it's important

Maressa:

Like leading up to

Natalie:

Yeah, I mean it's a breakup it's established that you no longer are engaged, it's established that I'm divorced. But what got us here, right? I mean, we obviously did fall in love. We obviously did have long committed relationships, right? So, okay, I guess I can start. I was 20 years old when I met the person that would become my husband and then currently and forever, my ex-husband.

Maressa:

Forever. Well, you're not so you're saying

Natalie:

I'm not. I'm not even going to joke with you, but my Instagram is full of like accounts

Maressa:

About people getting back together

Maressa:

Oh, that's weird.

Natalie:

And I'm like I know, being in the field that I'm in, I know that there's retargeting and stuff, but I'm like never, yeah, Just anyways. I digress

Maressa:

For the sake of your sanity. You are never getting back with your ex.

Natalie:

Like my girl, my girl Tay-Tay Tay- Tay

Maressa:

Tay Swift here. I am quoting another song. We are never ever ever.

Natalie:

So, yes, I started dating my ex-husband when I was a baby. I was 20 years old. I had just got out of a relationship from my high school sweetheart, who I was with, you know, from when I turned 16 to 20, I was maybe single for a whole

Maressa:

Whopping week

Natalie:

Week at the most honestly, like thinking back on it, it wasn't more than seven days.

Maressa:

Yikes

Natalie:

Yeah, so I've always up until 2022 for my whole life, like adult life. Even

Maressa:

You were in a relationship.

Natalie:

Yes, I'm a monogamous girlfriend, girly.

Natalie:

Yeah, I can't

Natalie:

I know that's not you,

Maressa:

That is not me. I I mean I have bounced from guy to guy

Natalie:

You have, and I know I was there both like there physically, but also like walking with you in your journey and hearing about that. But anyways, so yeah, I I think

Maressa:

Those who know, know,

Natalie:

We'll get there, we'll get there, we'll get there. Juicy stuff later in our current life. We're talking about our past life now

Maressa:

Yeah, we got to build this up, we do. We have to like build the foundation of everything.

Natalie:

That's solid. Yeah, we build the foundation by sharing, then everything, after which the after part is the fun part.

Natalie:

Yeah, it is and it'll be good because we'll like talk about what we're continuing to do to help in our mental health and in our healing journey, and absolutely this definitely is going to help, though I do believe

Maressa:

And a lot of the like times that I'm thinking, even though someone asked me the other day.

Maressa:

They were like is it triggering to think about your ex now a little bit more because you suppressed him for such a long time? And I really sat in that thought because I was thinking yes, I'm thinking about him, but talking about this is so therapeutic for me that it's not triggering in a sense where I'm sad, it's more of I'm so much stronger and happier

Natalie:

Yeah. I mean it took you a while to get there right. I mean we were all

Maressa:

Damn wow, just lay the truth down,

Natalie:

That's what we're here to do. I mean you know, when you go through an experience like a breakup, it fucking sucks. Your whole world changes. Yeah, you know like change. You do exactly yeah. So it definitely took you and me probably um a while to be okay with that, be okay with who we are are, be okay with, like, talking about it. It's almost you know. What is it when, like, people know but they don't want to say.

Maressa:

Are you saying like bystanders, like people that, people that know what you're going through, but they're not going to ask you. Yes, yeah, I don't know what is that called.

Natalie:

It's a saying anyways okay, so let's go back to what we were going to do.

Natalie:

Just to stay on track

Maressa:

You were, ou bounced from your high school sweetheart to your college sweetheart.

Natalie:

Yes, and I was about 20 years old. Okay, so when we were like thinking about this and sharing, you know, thinking of my life from like zero to before I started, became a girlfriend, before I became the future Natalie wife, I was dependent on my family. I was dependent on my parents. They supported me, right. They paid my rent, they paid my credit card, they gave me money for groceries. I was an extension of them, right. But then, once I graduated college, I became kind of an extension of the person that I was with, right, so I became an extension of him and he kind of became an extension of me. I feel that who I was as a 20 year old to who I am now is so different. I mean, I think that you even said this I don't know if you said this here or in conversations that you and I have um shit, where was I going? That damn dog is distracting me.

Maressa:

Note to self leave Bentley at home. Okay

Natalie:

Okay, I don't even remember. I was gonna say

Maressa:

You talking about how much growth, like who you are as a person at the 30 at like now

Natalie:

Oh yeah, but I still, I'm brain dead, okay, okay so

Maressa:

There's a lot of growth. Like, you started dating this person at 20 and that's really young, and you, you guys.

Natalie:

Yes, values Okay, my values are different. Right, I didn't have the same mindset as I did, even when I was still married. Like you know, and I think that the nice thing about dating somebody and becoming connected with them through marriage is you grew up together but, in my case, I feel that we probably shouldn't have gotten married, we probably shouldn't have ended up together, because it wasn't like a relationship that kind of bloomed and blossomed together, like he kind of became who he was, I became who I was and it was different than you know. I mean, mom used to tell me all the time you, you're not who you are, and yada, yada, yada. So we didn't like

Maressa:

Grow as a couple.

Natalie:

Yeah

Maressa:

You grew as an individual

Natalie:

Yes, yes,

Maressa:

So you grew like parallel to each other but not as like a true partnership

Natalie:

Fully entwined with each other, and I think that that is the difference between healthy.

Natalie:

Yeah, and I'm not saying like getting married young or getting married to your high school sweetheart or college sweetheart is a bad thing, because I truly think that it's a beautiful thing to truly grow up with someone. We did not do it together. We were separate and closed off. I think that there was a lot of stuff that maybe he was afraid to kind of dive into and there was some stuff that I was afraid to dive into. And you know, we stuck together because that's where we were.

Maressa:

You felt like it was what was right, because you felt like if you guys would have broken up, it would have been harder.

Natalie:

Yeah, I mean at that point we were, you know, engaged. I mean, I remember one time when we were in our little tiny stinky house remember that, that little house in North Carolina yeah, I remember having like a conversation about ending it. I mean there was a lot of stuff going on in my life when we were engaged. Wow, I didn't know that. Yeah, I remember it was like his father had passed away that same year and it was a hard time and me

Maressa:

Emotions were high.

Natalie:

Yeah, I mean honestly, like grief changes you. It changed you and I.

Maressa:

Yeah, I think we're still grieving, yeah, and I can't Not the relationship

Maressa:

Sorry, we're still grieving our dad. Our dad passed away in September, so four months later that.

Maressa:

I wanted to make that clarification

Natalie:

No, we're not grieving our,

Maressa:

But you do kind of grieve a relationship.

Natalie:

Oh yeah, we definitely grieved our relationship, but we're no longer grieving our relationship.

Maressa:

We're just grieving our father, but you were looping that because your ex lost his dad

Natalie:

Yes, and he was months before we got married, literally going through a grieving process and that's hard, that is so hard, yeah, we got engaged and then, like within six months, so thinking back and like having that conversation with him, but at that point we were already get together almost five years and you, just you, just did it right. I mean I kind of felt like my family was marrying me off. I'm not saying that if mom and dad would have said Natalie, I do not support this, I don't want you to marry him.

Maressa:

You wouldn't have walked away.

Natalie:

I'm not saying I would have, but I might have. Yeah, I would have considered it, but I think that because, like we kind of just it didn't get talked about.

Maressa:

Yeah. It was like a taboo.

Natalie:

That's the word I was looking for Taboo.

Maressa:

It's taboo like no one wants to talk about it no and yeah, totally.

Natalie:

So you know, I was somebody else and I've changed. I became somebody else even like through our relationship, and then I'm not gonna get into our marriage or our marital problems or you know that's private and we do want.

Natalie:

Yeah, I want to respect, yeah.

Natalie:

I do think that there was some. I should have been more aware yeah, and now you are yeah, which is why I'm single. Because I'm not, I would want to date. I've tried dating

Maressa:

The dating world sucks.

Maressa:

That could be another episode. Oh, I got some fun stories.

Natalie:

That'll be all you

Natalie:

You know. You should do an experiment and like get back on hinge or tinder.

Maressa:

I will. I actually thought about getting back on yeah for the content

Natalie:

For the content.

Natalie:

Well, I'm not gonna do it I don't know anyways, that's kind of your zero, yeah, zero to 20 year zero to.

Maressa:

I would say like 15 to 20. What year?

Maressa:

15 to 20, like zero, like you're, you're talking about zero and I'm thinking like just born

Natalie:

Oh, I'm thinking of like when my relationship started zero, you, you know, like year zero to get.

Maressa:

Yeah, okay, that's fair, that's fair.

Natalie:

What about you?

Maressa:

So similar situation. I met my ex in high oh God, not high school in college I was 20. Actually, I just turned 21 and he was about to turn 21. So we started dating and things were really good. We connected in a lot of things like culturally and like religiously we were both Catholic. We kind of shared some Hispanic connections and we both spoke Spanish, and probably the only Spanish speaking people in college I feel like I don't feel like there was well, no, I guess I guess there was. There was lots. Yeah, Okay, I take that back.

Natalie:

You're just trying to make yourself the only Spanish couple.

Maressa:

Yeah, you're right, that's fair. We weren't the only Spanish couple, but we just shared a lot of commonalities and that's what drew us together. We were,

Natalie:

You guys look good together.

Maressa:

Yeah, I would say I thought we were a pretty cute couple. We complimented each other, we did, and we did have a breakup year two. And now, looking back, I think that should have been somewhat of an alert on my end, because the reasoning was very similar to the reasoning as to why the engagement broke off, and I will talk about that later.

Natalie:

That was a red flag for me, though, like a red flag as your, as your older, as my older sister? Yes, Because, like I remember you coming to my house after y'all broke up and obviously I was still married, so was I was living with my ex-husband and you were obsessed, like you. Well, one you

Maressa:

I was obsessed and I was going through a breakup?

Natalie:

You were obsessed with him that it was a terrible experience for you. Like you were uncontrollable you know what I'm talking about.

Maressa:

Yeah, and I like hate to admit that I like was obsessed, but that's fine that's like I was so in love with him that I was, like low-key, enamored by him.

Natalie:

Okay, or aka just obsessed like. I remember having a conversation.

Natalie:

I know like who you are as a young person.

Maressa:

It's crazy. You want to become that person, you want to check all of the boxes for that person and I was doing all of those things and, yeah, the breakup was

Natalie:

How long were you broken up?

Maressa:

Oh god, June, July, and then we got back together in October. So four or five months give or take.

Natalie:

Um, oh, I didn't realize it was that long.

Maressa:

Yeah, we were. We were broken up, so we were dating and we hit our two year mark. He broke up with me

Natalie:

Because he said mom and dad didn't love him.

Maressa:

Something about mom and dad I can't. Obviously it's been eight like forever ago, but the reasoning was about my parents, something about my parents not supporting him or loving him the way he wanted, and he didn't like that. So his expectations of mom and dad were very, very high.

Natalie:

What were his expectations of his significant other? Like, were they just expect okay? So I will say this you were also low key, obsessed with his family.

Maressa:

Yes, I mean, I just did everything for his family. I bent over backwards for his family.

Natalie:

Exactly. Anytime that they had an event for a family member, you were making the trip to wherever it was. Yeah, out of state, because not everyone, they were not living in state, exactly.

Maressa:

Yeah, I did devote. I devoted my time to his family. I always put his family above mine, and there was a saying that I've read, where Even mom has said this where when you have a daughter, you gain a son, but when you have a son, you lose them to their wife. So I was essentially being like I was acting like a son. I was removing myself from mom and dad and just focusing on his family.

Natalie:

Mom and dad did not gain a son. They lost a daughter. A thousand percent, and they kind of did the same for me.

Maressa:

Yeah, exactly, and they, mom, like, subconsciously felt this from the beginning. But I was willing to look past it because when we were broken up we were so miserable and he realized he made a mistake. So he came back to me like duh, just kidding.

Natalie:

No, it took him five months.

Maressa:

Okay, maybe two, I don't know the timeline. It was fairly quick. It wasn't a long breakup, probably closer to it was over the summer, and then we got back together by the fall, before school started. Yes, so maybe like two, three months, eight weeks, yeah.

Maressa:

So we got back together and then things were really good. Granted, we had our fights, because no couple is perfect, and there were some things that I was always willing to look past because, again, I was wanting to just focus on us and focus on our future, and talking about our future was starting to become more and more. We then graduated college and we talked about how we didn't want to get married right out of college, because everyone from college that we went to got married and we were avoiding the status quo.

Natalie:

Well, he didn't want to do anything. That wasn't his idea. So if it, if he was like like he wanted to, yeah God, I hate him.

Maressa:

Okay. Well.

Maressa:

I thought we were going to stay classy. Anyway, I don't hate him and he broke my heart.

Natalie:

Okay, fine, hate is such a strong word strong word. Okay, he, I just really don't

Maressa:

You despise him and you hate how what he put me through. Because what he put me through it just doesn't make sense to nobody and no one's gonna understand. They're gonna say that's the reason he called off the wedding, eight years of being together. Like why then? Why did he propose? Great question

Natalie:

You should have kept the damn diamond.

Maressa:

I know rookie move. No one tells you.

Natalie:

I fucking told you

Maressa:

Okay, but you know how freaking amazing it felt to just yank that shit off of my finger and slam it on the counter. It was like a freeing moment for me. No, okay, well, yeah you told me, but I already left my ring.

Natalie:

Because you're dumb, Love you.

Maressa:

I would love to do a poll on Instagram. If, like, you're going through a breakup, if you keep the ring. I just want to know, if everyone knows that.

Natalie:

Yes, everybody knows it.

Maressa:

Okay, whatever. Case closed. I don't want to elaborate, but so we there were things that happened that Again. Now, looking back, I'm like I should have known, I should have seen this coming. I should have seen that issue because it was always there. It was always there and going back to our first breakup, it was there.

Natalie:

So let me ask you this when you and your ex-fiance were in college, did you do things? I know that you did things based on him and what he wanted. The friends that you hung out with were they your friends or were they his friends?

Maressa:

They were actually all of my friends because I was in a sorority and he was not in a fraternity, so a lot of my friends were like my. My sorority sisters has like boyfriends.

Natalie:

But they weren't his friends.

Maressa:

No, they became his friends. He did have some friends in college, but I didn't hang out with his friends in college. In college it was like me, because I was at my prime college.

Natalie:

Yeah, you were the homecoming court.

Maressa:

I was at my prime in college, like I was involved in the student government association. I was involved in a sorority. I felt like I knew a lot of people you did and, granted, our college also was a little bit tinier

Natalie:

Do you think it was like a d3 college when we were there, because I now it's a d2 school

Maressa:

Probably.

Natalie:

I mean it was small, it was small.

Maressa:

It was small. It was really small. I mean, aside from, like, the athletes, everyone like knew each other amongst like, in like Greek life. So I knew a lot of people, and he did too, but a lot of the people he met through me and. I didn't hang out with his friends because I wanted to hang out with his friends. I hung out with my friends and he kind of tagged along.

Natalie:

Okay, I was just curious.

Maressa:

Yeah, well, yeah, and that's a good point to bring. You know, leading up to it things were good, but I won't dive into those details just yet because I feel like that's for another episode. You know, you kind of feel like you could have you didn't see yourself marrying said person, or you felt like there were some things that you should have like removed yourself from, but you thought it was too taboo to like leave the relationship. Yeah, I definitely think it. The relationship, yeah, definitely I didn't think that because I knew he was my end game. I wanted it to be me and him, so I didn't think those things.

Maressa:

But I also was suppressing so many other things and deciding to turn a shoulder because I wanted to make this work, because I love hard and I will do whatever I can to make the person I'm with happy, and I was always doing those things and it was always what he wanted to do, what his timeline, and again, we waited, or we I waited what felt like eternity to get engaged, and and it always what he wanted to do, what his timeline, and again, we waited, or we I waited what felt like eternity to get engaged, and and it was because he wanted to do it when he was ready.

Maressa:

And in reality I was like, well, what about me, right? What do I want to do? And so there were just little things here and there that now, looking back, I could see myself not allowing as a 30 year old, because I now know what I want. And again, you made a point how we were so young and naive and we didn't know what we wanted and we also didn't know how to communicate those things. And I think it's really important that what I've learned in therapy is communication is so important and if you don't communicate those feelings, you're going to get stepped on, and I totally got stepped over.

Natalie:

He walked all over you.

Maressa:

He walked all over me, yeah, and he ruined a lot of things in my life, and I would say he completely ruined my self-confidence.

Natalie:

Why?

Maressa:

Because he walked away from an eight year relationship and we were together,

Natalie:

But like he didn't, he didn't hurt your self-confidence like while you guys were together.

Maressa:

Oh while we were together. He built that shit up like we had a very healthy relationship in that area. I was going to say classy, we had a great intimacy relationship.

Natalie:

If Chad's watching. He's going to be like

Maressa:

Chad. Our brother has heard so many things about my sex life over the years. He's probably scarred.

Natalie:

Anyways, anyway.

Maressa:

But we had a great sex life. I will say that. And so I am not prune and I am very

Natalie:

Prude,

Maressa:

Prude. I thought I said prude,

Natalie:

You said prune like the dried fruit, like the fruit that you eat when you're fucking constipated

Maressa:

I swore I said prude, but I said prune, okay, but I said prude, okay, I'm not prude. I'm very, very vocal with my sex life, like I am the type of person I'm not afraid to talk about it, but in the case of first episode, I'm going to pump the brakes those were. That was something that I thought again. We were good in a sense, but leading up to the engagement was when things got rocky, and while we were wedding planning was when a lot of things came to light.

Natalie:

More red flags came up.

Natalie:

Yeah, well, I think that you start to pull layers of individuals. Right, and you said it earlier, you love hard and anyone that you love, they feel the love immensely. Like you go, you are an amazing friend and with your significant other, with your ex-fiance, you were that to him, to his family and to anyone in his life, yeah, I would agree yes. You know, I think that that's.

Maressa:

That's who we were, who we were In the relationship and what we've realized and how we've changed. I mean because now we're different people.

Natalie:

Yeah, I mean we're not. I mean we're kind of cold hearted bitches

Maressa:

But we just have really high expectations right now.

Natalie:

I have no expectations. But I also, like I'm content with where I am right now.

Natalie:

Just managing my kids and

Maressa:

You are a single mom with three kids, so yeah, that's a lot, yeah

Natalie:

So anyways, I think that that's a good,

Maressa:

Really good, synopsis of leading

Natalie:

Of a little bit about us, a little bit of the pre the pre-relation yeah what, what kind of, led us to where we are and anyways. So if you've listened this long, thank you. First episode, thank you. We hope that by us sharing a little bit of our stories, you related to any of it connected to it. Um, some of you probably most of you listening to it has already heard it. Um, or experience the ogs it or experienced it with us while we were going through it. But we'll do it once a week. And do you have anything else to say?

Maressa:

No, just that. Next week we'll probably focus a little bit more of the breakup.

Natalie:

Okay. So you want to talk about 2022, next year Next? Yeah, so we're like so we're going to be in Chicago next week.

Maressa:

Yeah. So we actually yeah, we're going to go're gonna be in chicago next week. Yeah, so we actually yeah, we're gonna go into Chicago for our birthdays because we both we are, uh, five days apart. So five years, five days apart, aquarius babies. And actually one thing I want to note is, since the breakup, we've made it a tradition to celebrate ourselves and go on a sister birthday trip, and in 2023 we went to New York, last year we went to Colorado. This year we're going to Chicago. So it's an annual sister trip and we love it and it's a new tradition because we want to just celebrate us and how far we've come and just love us and we're deserving of it. So next week, when we record episode two, it'll be at In Chicago, in Chicago. So it'll be a cool little experience while we're there too.

Maressa:

So if you've listened this far, thanks, thank you so much. Thanks for going through the kinks with us because you know, like we said, we're not pros. We're gonna be learning about this podcast journey together and also you're gonna be learning about our journeys as well, so okay, well.

Natalie:

I think we're good. I think this was a good recap for episode one,

Maressa:

And we will see you next week.

Maressa:

Yep Bye.

Natalie:

We will see you next week. Toodles!

Maressa:

Toodles??

People on this episode

Contributor

Maressa

Host
Contributor

Natalie

Host